Christmas, 1981 December 20, 2007
Many of you may not remember Christmas in 1981, heck, maybe you weren’t even born then. However, I remember it like it was yesterday – it was the last Christmas that I spent with my mother.
That Christmas is one of the most special in my life. I distinctly remember that I RACKED UP, “Santa” brought me a 4-10 shotgun (we ARE in the South), a Polaroid camera and…AN ATARI. (My cousin and I played missile command and combat for hours.)
And for some reason that year my mom and dad asked everyone to come to our house to celebrate Christmas…and they did! I honestly can’t ever remember a time when all of the aunts, uncles, cousins, in-laws and out-laws were all in the same place at the same time.
Several things pop into my mind about the actual day itself. First of all—EVERYONE in my family smoked and I think I may have inhaled at least two packs that day due to second hand smoke alone. (I still cough just thinking about it!)
Second of all—THE FOOD! My mother made two turkeys for that day along with ALL of the sides. My dad wanted her to do all of the cooking—partly because she was the best cook on the planet and partly because he just didn’t trust my other aunts. (There was one aunt who literally picked her nose when she cooked—which made it especially bad when she brought corn—just being honest.)
Third—the FUN! I can still remember my aunt Ruth and uncle Charles getting into a tickle fight and my mother laughing at the whole thing. I jumped in and got hurt in the process…and she came and pulled me out, telling me that it would be ok.
That day seemed to go on forever—no one seemed to want to leave. I had a blast & remember asking could we do that same thing the next year. I remember the tired look in my mothers eyes when she said, “Maybe!”
I had no idea that night when I went to bed that my mother had just spent her last Christmas with me. I imagined there would be more, lots more—with food and gifts and her laughter. But in July of that next year she was diagnosed with cancer…and she went on to be with Jesus in November at the age of 49.
The next Christmas was silent for me—I did receive gifts and we had a tree…but the joy was gone. I distinctly remember thinking, “If I had only known last Christmas was going to be her last I would have spent WAY more time with her.” I had made the mistake of thinking, “Everyone will be here next year.” But they weren’t…which leads me to…
Do NOT waste this Christmas. Sure, you are going to be around relatives that you love AND ones that absolutely get on your last nerves—but the sobering reality is this—what if it is the last Christmas you are able to spend with them? Personally, I want to live a life of no regrets—and Christmas is the best time of the year to make things right with others.
This Christmas morning Lucretia and I will go wake Charisse up and bring her downstairs, read the Christmas story together as a family, open gifts and enjoy spending time with one another. I’m not quite sure…but I’ll bet my mom would have been proud of her. :-) I want every Christmas to be unforgettable for my family.
Oh…as far as my mom goes…I missed her that next year, as I do every year…but don’t feel sad for her. While Christmas Day of 1982 was sad for me it was joyous for her. You see, she REALLY was able to celebrate Christmas with the One who Christmas is all about. She sang, she celebrated, she danced and she rejoiced that cancer no longer had ANY effect on her body. She is enjoying Christmas now more than ever…and I will bet that they have asked her to cook for everyone up there!!!
Embrace relationships this Christmas. Hug a little tighter, laugh so hard that you get sick, make things right that have been wrong for awhile and enjoy the time that God gives you to spend with family and friends…create memories, make Jesus a birthday cake, drink in every moment and don’t take this time for granted—it truly is a gift from God.